The Sine Curve

Heyy party people yo...how did u find the last line...like sound of guitar from harmonium..
Nothing yaar, i started without any purpose..actually i was trying to change myself 4 few days bt i realized i am at ease when i am myself,and also i just listened to the song of late michael jackson, 'they don't care about us'. It just certified no one has time to think abt u ,do whatever u like. Its your life and u shouldn't waste it in imitating others. Half of the life is wasted in planning things and .....okk
I'll stop there i got the second warning of low battery n i think there is lot of fuckin stuff to write abt life. So i'll preserve it for later posts.
Yap, the title 'sine curve'. Its my life, actually its everybody's life.
I don't have much to write. OK I'll try to revise few things. Please don't panic next time I'll write something better next time surely...actually i had fever 4m few days so...okk no excuse...
So its 4 am and i am awake not because of any reasons of study. I had taken many English songs from ma friend in lko and i started listening to them at 2:00 am thinkin they would make me fall asleep,but they were too good,especially you're beautiful. Before that i listened to wicked hour on air fm rainbow at 1 . I hav to attend my lab in the morning so I'll not waste any time. I'll end it soon.
I was just thinking abt different phases of my life. When i was a child i used to ask my father what's the use of these text books. He never told me that they were for cramming and gettin good marks bt told that those were the teachings one should learn. And so i thought. Be good,help others,be honest and many more things which can surely screw ur life. Really yaar it doesn't work many times. But still m happy how i manage the things in a bad or worse way...let it be.
Now i have applied vicks over my chest and neck and its feeling very cozy in blanket. When i got 93 percent marks in 10th it was the biggest surprise for me,and ntse interview too, n nda too...wow yaar m not that worthless or was. May be 93 percent marks wasn't a very remarkable incident 4 others bt it was 4 me surely. It helped realizing me my potential, really , though i think i may never utilize it. FCUK. Same rona again.
Okkkk...so m telling u a nice incident of class 10th which initiated all d process. Though i was counted among good student coz of ma appearance bt i wasn't really a topper material. A new chem teacher came into our class after indrajeet ma'am left the school. Our new teacher was minu ma'am. I just attended her first class and was absent 4 few days coz of my father's illness. When i came after few days it was test that day. I sat among stars of my class and cheated vigorously and also used ma mind at some places. When the next day results were to be announced,our teacher told us there is a student who have got full marks and we had to guess. The names of powerpuff gals of our class were called first. Nay,next hint was he's a boy....then came other name...no again.. And finally my friends called my name. I don't know whether they believed in me or were just tryin to hav fun. But she said yes and asked who is dat boy. I was aghast,really , many of my schoolmates won't remember it ,but it was momento 4 me. I still hav dat copy with me. Later in next few tests when i restored my place i.e low ranker, she told me that she was surprised to see my marks. I thought if she feels m a topper, let it be, then i studied d most gruesome subject chemistry, i scored 78 out of 80 in pre sems...other teachers also started looking at me like a hidden star,fuck actually. i have used this word hidden star coz our maths teacher called me by the name 'chupa rustam' once. she was the same maths teacher who had made a brief appearance in class 8th or 8th in another branch of our school. i still remember that blast. we were given three questions in maths as homework. next day she was asking everybody for the solutions. when she reached to me i said ,"ma'am bas teen question nahi kiye". She pulled her hand backwards and applied all the physics to gain maximum momentum in her hand. the hand was stopped at ma face transferring the whole momentum to my face. you must know change in momentum is force and the force was awesome. that was a brief encounter with her. later chandan sir took her place. never mind ...may be she was used to doing all that...coz she recognized other students of class when she came back in class 10th but not me. every thing that came my way was just accident...nothing planned. Another pleasant experience was NTSE. it was national talent search examination. my brother brought me the form and i was fuming coz i never had the confidence in me. also it was last day and so it was a very hectic submission of form. a group of students was sent for ntse preparation to UP Board. i am going to end it soon...don't panic. the way i have started forgetting things i feel i'll forget all these soon so that's why i am just trying to jot it down. yap, the NTSE classes,it was also a fun i think if not then...its fun now. by my appearance i gave the impression of a very studious child rather a dumb child...i admit dude i was. coz i didn't answered to those questions which no body knew. forget it. our teacher was giving all of us books for preparations...as usual i was a slow person not jumping to have the good book...actually i didn't know about the books also. so at last i was left with a heavy rejected book. i returned home with a heavy bag and heavy heart. all the time i was thinking i was wasting time in those preparations coz i had my board exams also near. before the end of classes he started demanding books 4m all of us...i forgot to bring. and he said ,"beta kya karte ho uska,ek hi piece me hai,bahut moti thi naa,choti to nahi kar di". actually its fun thinking of all that now but it was insulting that time(coz i was dumb,i could have said something...alas i didn't say...just looked at him with sad eyed honesty..fcuk). I got selected in ntse in first round then. no one except me from ma branch and one 4m other branch. everything started changing, teachers started looking as a topper. and ma friends started suspecting me. They said," sala chutiya banata hai, raat me padh leta hai". no malice actually... my friends have always been with me. whether my studies have gone, i have lost, whatever they have been always with me. i knew they never meant that...(sala public post hai accha hi likhna hota hai :) )All those things just pushed me to the line 4m which jumping was the only option, i could never turn back. All that belief, responsibility n fuckin stuff just pushed me. I tell u yaar in the exam of history civics i with my group were roaming as usual one day b4 the exam. We went to make sure to one other student whom we can never understand to ask 4 important. But as usual everything was important acc. To him. We were relieved thinking that one of the subjects apart 4m english is left out in calculatin percent. But i thought i could never score in hindi. Though i was very good in internals coz my techer had the time to read ma views n stories, but no one in board exams. So i decided not to sleep dat night, i just read that history book once overnight. In the end it paid i got 90 in dat subject...many stories r creeping but leave it...later i also got selected in second round in NTSE. I was busted it interview...it was a horrible experience....sachan ki bhasha me bole to....holiii shittt....
When the board results were announced i was the 'topper'....shithead...
I tried to behave like that later but i couldn't coz i was never like that. It was a success by chance...sorry....it was a beautiful accident..take it this way. Many stories are still creeping in....those with my friends...dirty ponds,rain,cricket,cycle n all.......but no more.
After 12th i decided to go alone to kanpur 4 coaching. But nay...i had to experience the experience of my life.....i went with ma childhood friend, siddharth. In the beginning we studied hard and the practice material provided seemed unsufficient. But later what to tell...we 14 0r 15 in kanpur hostel were a family...coaching classes were occasional...and the occasion arrived only when we get bored in the hostel...lot of things to tell about kanpur yaar...i can't take it now.....will write soon...till then njoy ur life....